"It is possible to die from eating. But I think to be professional means you don't die." (Takeru Kobayashi)

Friday, November 14, 2008


The thing about good meals – or any meal, for that matter – is that they all come to an end at some point. The last bite of a Whopper. Savor it. The final hickory barbecue wing. Bittersweet. The last spoonful of chocolate chip cookie dough. At least it’s got three pieces of cookie dough in it.

In many ways this blog, from March 11, 2006 until the present day, has been one of the best meals I’ve ever had. Which is why, after 32 months and 453 posts, it’s difficult to admit that this post is my final bite. Oh sure, I could keep eating for many more months – years probably – but you gotta pay the bill and leave sometime, right?

I’ll still be around though. On MySpace, on EatFeats, on Flickr (it'll always be a sort of photo blogging extension of Mega Munch) and commenting on other CE blogs. And if you want to contact me via email, feel free (shoffner1974@yahoo.com).

As for the UEPa, we'll still be meeting and conquering restaurant challenges throughout the state. I'll also still keep on eating competitively in real life (I’ll never stop doing that), but my energy levels when it comes to food blogging just aren’t what they used to be and I didn’t want to simply disappear like so many bloggers do, into thin air with no explanation. I may even start a new blog. Something about baseball statistics or weird things found on eBay. I’ve got a few other ideas too.

It’s been a great ride and I won’t completely rule out a comeback here on MM, but for now I’m stepping away from the food blogging table. A huge thanks to everyone who has read and commented here over the years. This thing started out as a stupid blog about competitive eating and it turned into a stupid blog about competitive eating that actually gained a few readers. I hope to be half as lucky with my future blogging endeavors.

And so, I’ll leave everyone with three things I’ve learned during my time as the author of Mega Munch:

1. Adding ranch dressing to almost anything will increase your capacity by up to 10 percent. The same is true for competing against friends.

2. Bite, chew, swallow, repeat. If unable to complete steps three and four, perform any or all of the following: heave and feign nausea, jump up and down, press on stomach and wince painfully, fake step one and continue step two, throw remaining food items at crowd and/or fellow competitors.

3. When it comes to oversized food items, size and quality are inversely proportional. Exceptions: Ice cream sundaes, hot dogs, and the yet-to-be-created giant piece of bacon.

Speaking of bacon, I’ll leave you all with one last mouth-watering image. Thanks for reading, keep on eating, and don’t forget to tip the wait staff.

Monday, November 03, 2008


Remember: A vote for Obama is a vote for thick, juicy cheeseburgers. In fact, I think I read something in his Blueprint for America about investing in burger-related ventures. If he wins, I'm celebrating with a caribou burger!