AHH, THE LIFE OF A SPOILED ROCK STAR

This is pretty cool. The Smoking Gun has a listing of the actual contract riders from more than 200 bands and musicians. The contract rider is a document that specifies all kinds of demands and pamper me bullshit each performer wants before and after the show, including a listing of food and drinks they’d like waiting patiently for them when the arrive.

Check out the list of acts here. For most, the last few pages (or, in some cases, several pages) of the rider contains the food and drink requests. Click on the page numbers at the bottom.

Some include pretty normal requests. Many artists, including Axl Rose and Meat Loaf request one or more jars of honey. (I'm told some singers use it so sooth their voices before a show.) Others are disappointing. Marilyn Manson asks for Ruffles, Gatorade, gummi bears, diet coke and Pace salsa among the 20 or so items in his dressing room list. In other words, the second shelf of my cupboard is more hardcore than he is.

I guess I just don’t understand why these musicians are so needy. It's like they're stocking up for a nuclear winter or something. Then again, if I could request WHATEVER I WANTED and it would be delivered and waiting for me, I’d probably go a little crazy too.

I’d definitely need 12 bottles of COLD Corona beer (between 38 and 45 degrees or heads will roll!), 12 cans of assorted diet Coca-Cola products, one pound of buttered popcorn flavored Jelly Belly jelly beans...and a bunch of other crap. I’ll think about it and have my manager call it in the morning before we arrive.